March 16, 2012


Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always~ 1 Chronicles 16:11

This morning I had 22 emails in my in-box. That was just for Pure Modesty. I have two other email accounts for our family that I am trying to merge into one. Those two combined had 14.

How'd that happen?

I can vividly remember about three years ago when I decided to write a blog. Writing seemed innocent. The blog was about my family and the little milestones that would occur. Thoughts and ramblings in my head that  surfaced and I felt compelled to release them to the world...

I had followers.
I was "liked"
It was fun!

Then it morphed into ugly. My worth was in numbers and comments. The pat's on the back came through a computer. Something was not right and even though I understood, I fought against it. I want to feel wanted and popular.

Some days, I think to myself, "Where did all these people come from?" "Why would they "like" my blog? I really don't write that often so what's the deal?" I have a purpose for this blog, but I'm trying too hard to please man (in this case mostly women). 

Here I am again, feeling the same way. Things are blurry and I feel a bit dizzy. I'm loosing my focus. I struggle daily with remaining steady and disciplined. The "web" is just that for me. I get trapped. Caught inside, tangled and overwhelmed by the scale of it.

It's time to downsize and get back to my family and  my purpose Facebook may be quiet and emails may be sparse as I gaze upon the Father and soak in His will for this space. 

To focus our minds on the human nature leads to death, but to focus our minds on the Spirit leads to life and peace. ~Romans 8:6

Are you here too? Have you lost your focus? Here are some wonderful posts spoken from the heart that helped convict my own. Muthering HeightsTreasures From a Shoebox & Sarah Markley

6 Modest Musings:

Anonymous said...

Sister -- do you know why I "like" your posts? Because you are like the rest of us... Working to juggle God's direction, family and life and keeping on track. We all struggle but sometimes it's a blessing to know you don't stand alone as only person struggling. I struggle with juggling God's direction, single mom to my beautiful gift from God -- my son , work and life .... Whenever I feel overwhelmed I pray God show me that others go through same and it isnt as easy as it looks.... I love reading your posts you are a real Christian mother who is blessing to others!! God Bless... Shelly

Stephanie said...

Thank you Shelly! I was a single mom too with my oldest and only son! Bless you, sweet sister!

Victorianlady8 said...

Praying for you Stephanie, as you see the Vision that our God has just for you! Not for anyone ELSE just you Sweet Friend and when you see that vision and live by and for the Lord personal will be blessed! Love to you and You are in the know! You are in the Love of God's Family! I love you dearly!

ShannonC said...

I'm with you on a smaller scale! I blogged several years ago and while I had no large following, I felt that I was "known" among other prominent homeschool bloggers. They became FB friends and they knew who I was when I commented. Then I sort of took a break, didn't feel that I mattered, blah, blah, blah...Well, take two and I'm feeling SO frustrated. I started to blog again and joined twitter. Uh, things are going slowly. I have very few followers on twitter and I don't think anyone has even read my blog! I have to consider why I am doing these things. I think my deepest desire is to belong to a community and feel connected--I don't have a lot of real friends. I digress. Keep blogging if you feel that you are reaching out to anyone(I'm here!) or to keep a record of your family activities. In the end, I am journaling for me and if someone wants to join in my conversation, that is great. I don't want to be a super star blogger. I am already overwhelmed in a sea of bloggers anyway and I don't have time to keep up. Hmm...may need to blog this epic comment to remind myself! Blessings, Shannon C

Hope said...

My Dear Friend,
You have been such a blessing and encouragement as I work through my personal convictions.You are a true titus 2 woman. I pray you find your focus

Stephanie said...

Thank you you dear friend! I appreciate your encouragement!