February 03, 2012

Quiver Full

Caveat... I won't pretend to know everything...I understand I am leaving myself vulnerable with the mere mention of the the words "Quiver Full." Please understand that I am writing from my heart as my husband and I are still seeking wisdom, knowledge and understanding in this area of our lives.

“Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them…” ~Psalm 127:3-5

What does this passage mean?
What if I only had one child?
Does the amount of children you have make your quiver "full?"

Stacy McDonald, co-author of Passionate Housewives, Desperate for God wrote this (and I agree.)

“As long as someone has a lot of children, they may appear to embrace the call to train up more children for the Lord; we assume that they are “quiverfull.” But by doing so, we are looking at outward expressions (which can be deceptive) and assuming deeper, spiritual attitudes. Just because a woman has given birth to many children doesn't mean she’s quiverfull. Likewise, there is no way we can assume that a couple is not quiverfull, simply because they have no children; and we should not make any such assumption.
We believe that a couple can be quiverfull with no children at all! In fact, a single person can be quiverfull! It is a Scriptural mindset. When we welcome children into our families; when we are grateful for the precious gift of life, then we are quiverfull! Perhaps we should define quiverfull as having a sovereign view of God’s gift of children. That being said, I think we can prove ourselves to be NOT quiverfull by being obsessed with having MORE children, when God has closed the door.”

A brief history...
When my husband and I married, we never discussed how many children we would have. We also never thought that we would simply leave it up to the Lord as to the timing and amount of children we would have. In our unsaved and naive state of thinking, we simply didn't want to use birth control. No rhyme or reason, we just didn't think we needed to.

Thirteen years ago when I had my first baby, I required an emergency c-section. Seven years later when I was expecting our daughter we were all ago for a natural delivery. Because I had already had one surgery, we decided to deliver at the hospital instead of home. Seven months into my pregnancy, the hospital changed its policy and no longer allowed V-BAC's to take place. C-section number two followed at the advice of our doctor as did the next three.

When my third daughter was six weeks old she developed RSV and one early, terrifying morning, she stopped breathing in my arms. It was at this point in our lives that the Lord showed His mercy to us by both allowing our daughter to live and more importantly he displayed so clearly that he is the author of life.

We still do not use any form of birth control but our mind set on why not, has changed. Here is where it gets complicated for us.

Our hearts have a quiver full mind-set. My body, however may not.
Surgeries coupled with my personal health history of kidney problems may limit birthing more children. I know there are women out there who have had ten c-sections! Praise the Lord! Will I be one of them? I don't know...

I am thankful for the Author who does know. He has placed an wonderful OB in our lives who is a believer yet knows the risks involved with my health history. So many questions danced around my head that I have to place at the alter.

At the end of the day two words come to mind.

Fear & Prayer.

I am fearful of making an emotional, possibly irreversible decision. Living with regret that there are people missing from my life. So I simply must pray!

Children are a gift and a blessing from the Lord. I am thankful for each one of my babes He has given me and pray I am blessed with more!

Here is a short clip from 18 Kids and counting. You may view the entire clip or fast forward to about the 4:40 minute mark. Enjoy!

"It is in the hands of God as far as we are concerned. By His Grace, I will carry a baby. And by His grace I'll give birth to the baby and by His grace we will be able to take care of  that child, however that works out."~ Michelle Duggar

As we anticipate the birth of our sixth blessing, I have decided to throw myself a baby shower and your invited! Please join as I post all about "Baby Love" and share some fabulous giveaways each day next week!

4 Modest Musings:

A Restful Place said...

Great post! Excited about your baby shower. :)

Anna @ Feminine Adventures said...

SO loved your post! A friend and I were just talking about the fear we mothers face. There are so many decisions, from birth control to vaccines to schooling.

God has given us principles in His word, but not clear cut answers to so many of these questions. Sometimes, knowing what path to follow is so hard.

As you said, it comes down to prayer and fear. God knows what is best. We should be diligent, pray, but not fear to step forward in faith!

Looking forward to your baby shower!

Laurie said...

This post spoke volumes to me...

Please let me explain why.

Last May I married my God sent prince of a husband.

We started out not wanting children for a year so I went on Birth control.

It messed my body up in more ways than even I can count.We had not even been married two weeks before I had violent morning sickness,and was terribly sick.

When the doc explained it was the birth control doing this to my body,my husband got scared ,and took me off the bc for fear of my health.

The next few months were filled with praying,sickness,and so many failed pregnancy test I sometimes never want to take another .

My head was filled with questions and for a time i was bbitter that God didn't just give me a child.

But our Lord was teaching me to trust Him fully.

He knows when my husband and I will be ready for His precious gift of a child (WE LOVE CHILDREN,so waiting and trusting makes it hard on us )
He knows how many He wants us to have.And trusting Him has never been sweeter.

It has taken eight months without bc of any form ,and 5 months of prenatals to get me back to a more healthy body.

Not using any bc can cause raised eyebrows and concerned looks that these newly weds don't know what were doing,But God has brought us to this place...and PRAISE HIM for I am learning more out of this than i could ever imagine.

It makes me feel "Quiver Full"

Anonymous said...

I don't understand the hoopla of this "quiverfull." It seems to have a negative connotation attached to it that I don't understand...I'm so happy for you guys. I really enjoy hearing Michelle Duggar speak- she is such a sweet woman. -Nicole @ Working Kansas Homemaker